Believing that no-one likes you can be an incredibly lonely feeling.
If you don’t have a large social circle, feeling like no-one likes you can make it very difficult to find new friends.
If you do have friends and relationships, you can be left worrying that people are only hanging out with you through a sense of obligation.
I’ve put together this quiz to help you understand why you might feel this way, and what you can do about it. Whether your belief that others dislike you is true or not, there are things you can do to help build the social network that you want.
Also, see our guide on what to do if you don’t have any friends.
Sections
Part 1: Assessing your situation
Part 2: Thought patterns that make it hard for people to like you
Part 3: Behaviour patterns that make it hard for people to like you
Show references +
References
- Nickerson, R. S. (1998). Confirmation bias: A ubiquitous phenomenon in many guises. Review of General Psychology, 2(2), 175–220.
- Muris, P., Merckelbach, H., & van Spauwen, I. (2003). The emotional reasoning heuristic in children. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 41(3), 261–272.
- Jamali, H. R. (2019). The battle against cognitive bias. InCite, 40(9/10), 40.
- Hall, J. A. (2018). How many hours does it take to make a friend? Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 36(4), 1278–1296.
- de Jonghe, F., Kool, S., van Aalst, G., Dekker, J., & Peen, J. (2001). Combining psychotherapy and antidepressants in the treatment of depression. Journal of Affective Disorders, 64(2–3), 217–229.
- Reeck, C., Ames, D. R., & Ochsner, K. N. (2016). The Social Regulation of Emotion: An Integrative, Cross-Disciplinary Model. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 20(1), 47–63.
- Hill, C. L. M., & Updegraff, J. A. (2012). Mindfulness and its relationship to emotional regulation. Emotion, 12(1), 81–90.
- Kowalski, R. M. (1996). Complaints and complaining: Functions, antecedents, and consequences. Psychological Bulletin, 119(2), 179–196.
- Bell, P. A., Kline, L. M., & Barnard, W. A. (1988). Friendship and Freedom of Movement as Moderators of Sex Differences in Interpersonal Distancing. The Journal of Social Psychology, 128(3), 305–310.
- Odd, T. B. (2012). Loud talkers: Why do some voices seem to be set at top volume? NBC News.
- (2020). Public and Private Space. Pacific.Edu.
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Why didnt it give me my results??!?
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