Deep talks can be a little difficult sometimes, but they are important for couples to understand their feelings, thoughts, and dreams. Such conversations make their love stronger and long-lasting. Asking good love questions to spark interesting conversations can help you establish a deeper connection, whether in a new or old relationship. Try some of the following 139 questions to get closer to your partner.
Sections
- Love questions to ask your boyfriend
- Love questions to ask your girlfriend
- Deep questions about love
- Tricky love questions
- “Would you rather” love questions
- 36 questions to make you fall in love
Love questions to ask your boyfriend
Creating a strong bond with your boyfriend means asking good questions that promote open communication and help you understand each other. You should have a safe space to talk about your feelings, needs, and worries.
Don’t ask questions that feel like a test to see if he loves you. Focus on having real and important conversations. It might be hard to hear and accept criticism, but working on yourself can improve your relationship and make it more loving.
1. What would be your perfect date with me?
 
2. What are some of the things that you love most about me?
 
3. How do you feel about public displays of affection with me?
4. What are your favorite memories of us together so far?
 
5. Do you feel able to respect my opinion, even if it’s different from yours?
 
6. Do you want to meet my friends and family?
7. What was the reason for most of your last relationships ending?
 
8. When do you feel the most loved by me?
 
9. When do you feel the most distant from me?
10. Do you think I do a good job of making you feel trusted and in your masculine?
 
11.Are there any habits I have that are negative for our relationship?
 
12. Do you feel like we have a good balance of time alone and together?
13. Do you think that we can improve how we fight?
 
14. What is your love language?
 
15. Can you see us being good parents together?
16. How do you feel when we don’t see each other for a few days?
 
17. What are your favorite memories of us together so far?
 
18. How do you feel about discussing finances and money management in our relationship?
19. How do you define commitment, and what does it mean to you in the context of our relationship?
 
20. What are some personal boundaries that you feel are important to uphold in a relationship?
If this is a new relationship, you might find these questions to get to know him helpful.
Love questions to ask your girlfriend
Here are some love questions to ask a girl that will help you make her fall in love with you. By asking a girl deep questions, you can make it easier for her to be sure that you are invested in getting to know her.
1. Do you know how beautiful I think you are?
2. What is your favorite thing about me?
3. What would you consider a perfect date?
4. When do you feel the most connected to me?
5. What do you love most about how I make love to you?
6. Are there any ways that I could love you better?
7. What is something that you really want to do with me?
8. When do you feel most listened to by me?
9. What qualities of mine do you find the most attractive?
10. What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given?
11. When do you feel the happiest?
12. How do you know when you’re in love?
13. What kind of wedding do you want?
 
14. What is your dream home?
 
15. Do you believe in true love?
16. What are some unique ways I can make you feel special and appreciated?
 
17. How do you feel about our balance of independence and togetherness in the relationship?
 
18. Are there any ways you’d like to see our relationship evolve or grow?
19. In what ways can I better support you in achieving your dreams and aspirations?
 
20. What are some things you enjoy doing together that bring us closer as a couple?
 
21. How do you feel about blending our families and friends, and do you have any concerns or ideas for making it successful?
 
22. What are some traditions or rituals you’d like to create or maintain in our relationship?
If you’re willing to dig deeper, you might like these deep questions to ask your girlfriend.
Deep questions about love
If you want to get past surface-level conversation, asking your romantic interest deep and philosophical questions can help you do so. Help figure out if you are with the love of your life by asking them the following questions about love and relationships.
1. Do you believe love takes work?
 
2. How would you describe love in 3 words?
 
3. Do you believe in second chances?
4. Has anyone ever broken your heart?
 
5. How important is romantic love to you?
 
6. Do you feel like your parents did a good job modeling love?
7. Does love feel safe to you?
 
8. Do you have any trauma from your past relationships that you’re still working through?
 
9. Are there any ways that I can help you feel more cared for?
10. What makes people fall out of love?
 
11. Do you think that love is the most important thing in a relationship?
 
12. How would you describe your perfect relationship?
13. Have you ever been in love before?
 
14. Do you believe in love at first sight?
 
15. Once you love someone, can you ever stop loving them?
16. How important is trust to you in a relationship, and how do you think we can strengthen it?
 
17. What are some personal boundaries that you feel are important to uphold in a relationship?
 
18. How do you handle disagreements or conflicts in a relationship, and are there ways we can improve our communication during
19. How do you define commitment, and what does it mean to you in the context of our relationship?
 
20. Are there any relationship fears or insecurities you’d like to share, and how can I help alleviate them?
Tricky love questions
Asking these questions might not be the easiest, but the following love questions can help to spark deep conversation with your partner.
1. Were you nervous during our first kiss?
 
2. What was your first impression of me?
 
3. Do you believe in soulmates?
4. When was the first time you knew you loved me?
 
5. Do you remember our first date?
 
6. What is one thing you’re looking forward to experiencing with me?
7. When was your first kiss?
 
8. What do you think is my biggest weakness in our relationship?
 
9. Can you picture us growing old together?
10. What is the happiest memory you have of the two of us?
 
11. What quality of mine are you most attracted to?
 
12. What is your favorite part of sex?
13. Do you think a relationship can come back from cheating?
 
14. What is the weirdest thing that turns you on?
 
15. Do you think that we talk too much during the day?
16. How would you handle it if we disagreed on a major life decision, like where to live or whether to have children?
 
17. Have you ever kept a secret from me, and if so, why?
 
18. How would you feel if we had to spend a significant amount of time apart due to work or other circumstances?
19. What do you think is the biggest challenge we face as a couple, and how can we work together to overcome it?
 
20. How do you feel about discussing our past relationships and learning from them to strengthen our current connection?
 
21. If we were to face a difficult situation or crisis, how do you imagine we would handle it together?
22. What are your thoughts on maintaining attraction and passion in a long-term relationship?
 
23. How would you define “emotional cheating,” and have you ever experienced it in a previous relationship?
 
24. Are there any subjects or topics you find difficult to discuss with me, and how can we create a safe space for open communication?
 
25. What are your thoughts on maintaining friendships with ex-partners?
“Would you rather” love questions
“Would you rather” love questions are an entertaining way to add a playful twist to your conversations, whether you’re on a first date or enjoying a cozy night in with your partner. These lighthearted questions can spark intriguing discussions and provide insights into each other’s preferences and desires. They’re perfect for couples at any stage, helping to keep the conversation lively and engaging.
1. Would you rather spend a night with me in a 5-star hotel or a simple bed and breakfast?
 
2. Would you rather have love or money?
 
3. Would you rather have your partner dislike all your friends, or your friends dislike your partner?
4. Would you rather spend all day with me in bed or out adventuring?
 
5. Would you rather have a partner who makes okay money and is always home, or makes great money but is always away working?
 
6. Would you rather stay in or go out for a date?
7. Would you rather ask for help or figure it out by yourself?
 
8. Would you rather cook together at home or go out to a fancy restaurant?
 
9. Would you rather have a partner who is famous or who is rich?
10. Would you rather live by the sea or in the mountains?
 
11. Would you rather be proposed to in public or in private?
 
12. Would you rather go on a romantic getaway to a tropical island or a snowy mountain cabin?
13. Would you rather have a small, intimate wedding or a large, extravagant one?
 
14. Would you rather celebrate our anniversary with a surprise or plan it together?
 
15. Would you rather have the ability to read each other’s minds or have the perfect relationship without that ability?
16. Would you rather express love through verbal affirmations or through actions?
 
17. Would you rather have a spontaneous romantic gesture or a planned, elaborate one?
 
18. Would you rather have a relationship with no arguments or one with arguments that help you grow as a couple?
19. Would you rather be with someone who is overly affectionate or someone who is more reserved with their emotions?
 
20. Would you rather be the one who initiates physical affection or have your partner initiate it?
If you love these more lightweight questions like these, take a look at this list of “would you rather” questions.
36 questions to make you fall in love
The “36 Questions to Make You Fall in Love” is a thoughtfully crafted set of questions, created by psychologist Arthur Aron, after years of psychological research. The questions were designed to build strong connections and closeness between two people. The questions he selected help uncover deeper feelings and promote understanding in a relationship by encouraging open and honest communication.
Aron organized his love questions into three sets of questions that touch on increasingly intimate topics. He suggested using them like this:
Choose a time when you and your partner can meet for 45 minutes. Start with the first set of questions and take turns asking and answering them for 15 minutes. Make sure to alternate who goes first. After 15 minutes, move to the second set, even if you haven’t finished the first one. Finally, spend 15 minutes on the questions of the third set. The 15-minute blocks help you share the time equally at each level.
First Set
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
 
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
 
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
 
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
 
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
 
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
 
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
 
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
 
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
Second Set
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?
 
14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
 
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
 
17. What is your most treasured memory?
 
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
 
20. What does friendship mean to you?
 
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
 
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
 
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Third Set
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling…”
 
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…”
 
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for them to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
 
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
 
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them [already].
 
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
 
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
 
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
 
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how they might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
Common questions
How can asking love questions help you become closer?
When you ask love questions, it shows your partner you’re really into getting to know them better. This helps you both gain a deeper understanding of each other, making you feel more connected and boosting your intimacy.
What questions can change your love life?
Questions that can change your love life are ones that start deep, meaningful conversations. Focus on asking your partner questions that’ll help you understand each other better as a couple and work through any relationship hiccups. Just remember, it’s not cool to ask questions only to ‘test’ your partner.
What is the most romantic question?
You might think the most romantic question is “Will you marry me?” and that’s definitely up there. Romance is all about showing love and commitment, so any question that sparks those feelings—while being right for where you’re at in your relationship—is a top choice.
How do I ask deep love questions without making my partner uncomfortable?
To ask deep questions without making your partner uncomfortable, approach the conversation with empathy and real curiosity. Make sure you create a safe space for open communication, and be ready to actively listen without judging. You can also let your partner know you’re asking because you want to learn more about them and grow together.
How often should I ask love questions in a relationship?
There’s no set rule for how often to ask love questions, as it really depends on you and your partner’s unique vibe. The key is to keep the lines of communication open and honest. Just ask questions as they come up naturally in conversation or when you’re reflecting on your relationship.
Can these love questions help improve long-term relationships?
Absolutely! These questions can improve long-term relationships by promoting open communication, vulnerability, and understanding. As your relationship grows over time, it’s important to keep learning about each other and nurturing your connection. Having these deep chats can bring back the passion and strengthen your relationship’s foundation.
Are there any love questions I should avoid asking my partner?
It’s important to be mindful of your partner’s feelings and boundaries when asking questions. Stay away from questions that might trigger past traumas, make them feel trapped, or cause unnecessary conflict. Keep in mind, these conversations should be about understanding and empathizing with your partner, not interrogating, testing, or criticizing them.
