How to Get Past Boring Small Talk And Connect

How to be more interesting (if you don’t automatically get noticed)

How do you stand out and catch people’s interest if you’re not super charismatic or have an amazing life?

That’s what you learn in our course Invisible to Interesting.

This course is for you who…

  1. Feel like you aren’t interesting (and don’t automatically get noticed)
  2. Worry that you’ll bore or bother people
  3. Don’t know what to say, and because of that feel like you don’t have much of a personality
  4. Feel uncomfortable sharing about yourself
  5. Feel like you lack knowledge or experience, and don’t want to look stupid or like you don’t know stuff, so you avoid engaging in conversation
  6. Feel like you’re bragging when you do talk about your experiences

Click here to learn more about Invisible to Interesting.

408 Comments

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  1. I have a hard time making conversation with people. Sometimes I really want to talk to someone and be their friend, but I’m too much in my head and I can never figure out how to talk to them so I just keep quiet. Whenever I’m talking to someone I constantly rely on them to make the conversation because I never know what to say. When I do say something, I often stumble on my words because I’m so nervous about what the other person thinks about me.

    Reply
  2. I want to improve on the awkward, anxious feeling. Make conversations go further than hi, how are you? I want to be relaxed and feel comfortable when starting a conversation.

    Reply
  3. I really appreciate this video. I recently realized that most of the people I know are acquaintances that I don’t have a connection to, but hopefully with this I can try to make some closer friends.

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  4. Hi David
    Well the thing is when I’m in a situation where i have to converse with someone, it gets really awkward. I’m constantly wondering if I’m not good enough to talk to or if i sound too boring. There are a lot of awkward silences and I mentally cringe everytime it happens. It feels like I’m coming off as very rude and I always depend on the other person to start talking again. It makes me feel stupid and hopeless.
    So I’d like to learn to keep a conversation going and not appear rude or boring, and I’d love to improve my social skills and appear more friendly and confident.
    Thank you!

    Reply
  5. Hi David.

    Most of the times I don’t know how to start a conversation with other people even if I really want to talk to them. I don’t know how to do first moves and approach others but I’m trying. I sometimes think that I’m boring and that person will say something to me or laugh at me. But the good thing about me is that, when someone starts a conversation I know how to shift such topics. There are also times of an awkward silence. These are the things I want to improve.

    Reply
  6. Hi David.
    I think it’s awkward when people ask me about something “more deep” like what I think about something and I don’t have an answer. I get a question like “What do you think about this…” And I thinks for a second and then I just say “I don’t really know” And then its gets silent and awkward. It’s also very awkward when the person I talk to always have many thoughts about a subject and I don’t have any. The person open ups so much to me I just say “I don’t know”, and then they think that it’s unnecessary to open up to me because I don’t open up to them.

    Reply
  7. Hi David,
    Now of course im absolutely terrible when it comes to starting and hold a conversation so these are my things i want to improve myself

    Reply
  8. Hi David
    I find it difficult to talk to People when I meet them for the First time so inevitably they feel I am rude or not interested in talking to to them how do I overcome this problem

    Reply
  9. I want to be confident and start a conversation with people. I want to be confident facing people. I want to talk long without stuttering. I want these fears to be gone.

    Reply
  10. I appreciate that you back everything up with science and often do a little blurb about the scientific study itself. It assists me in understanding and valuing your argument.

    Thank you, thank you, thank you, for this work.

    Reply
  11. How to reply to bullying in a gathering and at the same time keep a good image of me that show maturit. At the same time let these people don’t think of make bullying again.

    Reply
  12. I feel that conversations on a professional level, need to be appropriate, and at the same time I am “feeling out” the other person. I enjoy open communication knowing it is safe and respected. I am sincerely and honest, however, some people are players. Having respect boundaries is necessary to see what direction the interaction will take you. Hopefully I gain a new friend.

    Reply
  13. Hi where do I find places to meet people besides a bar which I am not interested in? I would like to find something like a mixer or a single cruise if they have those things anymore? If not where do I go?

    Reply
  14. Just scared of too start a conversation with anyone with a Hart..Don’t know how too keep the conversation going either soo …just sucks for me …

    Reply
  15. I feel exactly the same way (except for cofee, which i rarely drink) when i talk to people i feel like ask too many questions without giviving enough info about me, also i m going too fast thru the conversation without giving enough time to one subject.

    Reply
  16. I just want to be more confident around people, especially girls. I’m ok but not great at talking to people, so when I want to give a girl that I am interested in a complement I get a feeling in my chest so that eventually I overthink everything and don’t actually say anything. Overall, my goal is to improve on talking to everyone as well as becoming more confident around girls I like.

    Reply
  17. Can we get more information that is current to life now? How do you meet people when they won’t allow social gatherings and people are mostly hiding their faces?

    Reply
  18. I think the people I talk to are really cool, but I don’t feel like I’m inputting enough or opening up enough. I often find people trying to get me to open up and then I shut them off by bringing the conversation back to them. I don’t know if its a form of insecurity about my life or the fear of making it all about me. So I want to make genuine relationships with people where we’re both content.

    Reply
  19. Thank you for your advice! I have no idea how to make friends and I’m often forgotten about, but this is very useful. I had no idea this could work!

    Reply
  20. I found your your use of sharing personal interest about subject useful. I thought it’s an opened invitation for communication to slowly build between one another.

    Reply

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